Thankful

What a wonderful Thanksgiving we had! I absolutely love being with my family..... Everyone in my family.... The kids and I went to Greenville on Wednesday (Chad was working). Wednesday night, my brother came down and my sister and her family came over to Mama and Daddy's. Daddy made a fire and we roasted marshmallows and made smores.... Well, that isn't exactly how it went. It was more like this.... The 6 kids burned marshmallows, would bring them out, try to blow on them, but it wouldn't blow out... So they ended up in the fire. Then they would get the hershey bars and break off pieces of chocolate and eat a bite, and then give one of the dogs a bite.... And I made smores. I realized after about the 4th one that I didn't need to eat anymore....

Chad showed up really late Wednesday night, so needless to say, the kids waited until he got there. Preston has completely turned into a Daddy's boy. He loves everything about Chad. He kept saying, "I sleep RIGHT NOW with Daddy." But Chad hadn't arrived yet. Finally around 11pm, he showed up. Preston refused to go to bed until he got there. He follows Chad around like his little shadow. When you ask him how much he loves daddy, he smiles and says, "BIG!!!!" I just love him!

Thursday Daddy and Chad and Charles went and played golf, and Mama and I prepared our Thanksgiving lunch... Yes I said Prepared... My daddy had been cooking all week, so there wasn't much cooking to do. The food was soooo delicious! Cole absolutely loves the idea of being together with family. He thinks it is great to go and play with his cousins and have Poppi act "CRAZY" and have Mimi slip him soft drinks and candy.

Chad had to drive back to Fuquay Thursday night. He had to work on Friday and my poor Preston..... He cried as he watched Chad's truck pull away with our Golden Dodger, aka Bubba... He just cried, DADDY, BUBBA, DADDY, BUBBA! I tried taking him away from the window, but little tears just fell down his cheek. He just longs to be with Daddy...

Thursday night, Mama and Daddy babysat my kids and I went to the movies with Shannon and Charles. I LOVE my sister and brother. Some how when we are all together alone (not often) the most ODD subjects are talked about, a few foul noises are heard (from Charles of course), and MANY MANY laughs are had. Usually Shannon says something that didn't exactly make much sense, I am the one who calls it out, Charles shakes his head and we all loose our breath laughing.

We were able to catch a great deal and get into the movie for free... When we arrived, I thought it may be a private showing because we seemed to be the only breathing creatures other than the few girls working the snack stand. Charles refused to get popcorn because he swears the kids who run the popcorn stand probably pee in it at night... His face told the story... YES, he admits he had friends who did that when they were young.... hmmmm. Can I get a small popcorn with butter and a small coke zero.??? Thank you... Didn't taste like urine to me.... :) We get into the movie, and it is pitch black with no one in it... About 5 mins after it was supposed to start, Charles gets up to go tell them there is no movie... They start the movie and we were lucky.... They skipped the previews... Only Shannon would think that stinks.... She wanted to see the previews.... Our typical movie goes like this. Shannon- Oh wow! I want to see that!!! Charles- Shannon, don't be like Dad and talk through the movie... Me- Is somebody going to help me eat this popcorn???? Shannon- I will.... 10 mins later.... Me- You want popcorn? Shannon- Yes.... doesn't get any though... Shannon- What just happened? Charles- Stop talking in the movie.... Shannon- bust out laughing... Me- Is somebody going to eat this popcorn? Shannon- yes, me.... never gets any....

We leave the movie (which was great) and Shannon is ready to take a picture. I think we were definitely the only ones in the theater at this point. We are saying Cheese like 4 or 5 times and the pictures kind of takes but not great... Next thing you see, Charles starts running to the car....never really got the picture and he wasn't really worried about it... Typical man, typical brother.... love him so much!

 This is Charles and his wife Whitney.... Cole has a crush on her...

 My sister Shannon.... I call her Nae Nae

                                         Us as three little trouble makers and dirty mouths.

I sure miss my family. I miss my sister and brother and mom and dad. Charles lives in Richmond, Va and I only see him a few times a year. Wonder why? Because it takes 4 hours to get there... What a lame excuse. I've got to get better about that! He is my baby brother. Even if he is a 31 year old 6 ft married man.... Who I will add maybe one of the best looking men around...:) I miss my sister too. We have so much fun when we are together. We are polar opposites in almost every aspect of who we are, yet we understand each other better than anyone else ever could. Her kids are my kids best friends and I love that.

I can't wait for Christmas..... November and December are my favorite months of every year!!!

Birthdays

This past month has been filled with birthdays. Friends, family, animals, mine and Chad's. I have been thinking a lot lately.... What is a birthday? The dictionary describes it as the annual day of one's birth. But I disagree. I think beside the word birthday, it should have balloons, a cake, friends, family and pictures of good times. That is always what a birthday was to me when I was growing up. Some say, oh it's just another day.... Well, you are very wrong if you say that. A birthday is a day you make someone feel special and celebrate them being born. I think it is a day you should let that person know how grateful you are for them and what they mean to you..... Today is Chad's birthday,  and I know he felt the love of his friends and family. And I let him know specifically how grateful I am that he was born...

 All of the above is the "earthly" birthday we celebrate. Where I have put my thoughts are the other "birthdays" we should celebrate. August 24th, 2008 is the day Chad and I both accepted Christ and became "born again" Christians. We absolutely acknowledge this day each year, but next year I think we will really celebrate. I am going to get balloons and a cake, and maybe even have a party. This is the "birthday" I am the most grateful for. This is the day God wrote my name in the book of life. This is the day that I felt peace over me knowing I made the decision to accept Christ as my Savior and saved a spot for me in heaven..This my friend..... is a day to celebrate...

Another "birthday" to celebrate are the one's that are probably the hardest to celebrate. That day would be the day the ones we know that accepted heaven as their home and have already entered the Pearly gates. You know there was a party when they arrived. Jesus probably greeted them while the Angels were singing.... I think I will start to celebrate those days as well....

I recently started reading a blog my sister told me about http://byrdhouse-byrdsnest.blogspot.com
after many many tears and heartbreak, I realized they will celebrate too. What an amazing faith in God this family has. Her faith is unshakable through out the storm. I pray I too could be so strong.

All of these days are considered "birthdays," and I am ready to celebrate them all....

Below are some pictures my friend April Fraley did for me.... They were a gift to Chad for his birthday....

Wrong Worship

After listening to the most recent video I shared on Facebook titled "Wrong Worship" (the link is below) it really made me think.... I remember so well a little over 3 years ago being in that EXACT place in my life. I would go to Church maybe 1 Sunday every 2 months, and I would leave and say to myself... I am going to try and get back next Sunday. I would feel so good after going and by Monday morning.... well, I had pretty much forgotten what was said or how I felt.... It was an inconvenience to "find time" to go to Church. I had too much going on... Chad worked alot... Cole really wouldn't like the nursery..... excuse after excuse after excuse... Thinking the excuses would make it all go away....

All I can say now is Thank you Lord for your Mercy and your Grace. I think to myself, WHAT IF God would have made the same amount of time for me that I made for him?.... And not only WHAT IF HE WOULD HAVE, but WHAT IF HE DID NOW TOO?.... I thank God for Chad. I thank God for giving me a husband that when he makes a decision, he sticks to it. There is no question as to "are we going to Church  this Sunday???" Or a time where we go like "good" Christians and then fall back into bad habits because I like to make my own decisions instead of following what God wants me to do.  I know myself well enough to know when I accepted Christ 3 years ago, I needed someone to keep me in check. If I didn't have that,  I would gone to  Church when it was "convenient" which would have been when I wasn't busy traveling to different places, staying up late partying like it's 1999, or just because Cole wouldn't sit through it... In other words, I would have been a back slider singing the "Wrong Worship" song...

I am so far from being a Perfect Christian, which is why I can still relate to the "Wrong Worship" song. There are times I just don't feel like Obeying. Instead of getting into the Word, I want to watch the DVR'd X-Factor or Pan AM! Instead of praying when I wake up, I want to jump in the shower before everyone wakes up and have time to get some things done... Instead of praying at night, I sometimes just want to go to sleep because I am so exhausted.... Instead of doing a circle of prayer with Chad in the mornings, I sometimes just want to get the kitchen clean from breakfast....

This leads me to really think.... What if God did the same to me.... What if he didn't feel like blessing me with my health today because he was too busy blessing the ones who gave him their all? What if he didn't feel like keeping my children healthy because I was too busy abusing my own body? What if he didn't feel like blessing our family with an income because he was too busy blessing the ones who weren't being greedy? What if..... what if.... what if.......???? And we still choose to do what we "feel like doing"..... I could be selfish and say, you know what.... I am tired of not doing the things I did in my past. I had fun, I didn't hurt anyone, I am a good person.... and I am saved now anyway, so I am not going to hell..... I am going to look up and say God, Thanks.... But No thanks..... I will deal with it when it is my time to do so..... I could do that....... Thank God I choose not to.... Because it is a choice. It is a personal choice we all struggle with everyday.... When deciding what I will or won't  partake in, I ask myself 2 questions.... 1. Could I witness to someone by doing what ever it is I am about to do? Could I be an image of Jesus Christ and draw others to him???? and 2. Do I want my children to be like me? Or do I expect more from them? They will be exactly who I am.... I can't say "do as I say, not as I do".... Or will I? I thank God that my desires have changed.

Oh Lord, I pray that others will see the "wrong worship" song and think to themselves.... Is This Me? And I pray you deal with their hearts like you did mine...
http://www.firstorlando.com/Ministries/Support_Ministries/Music_Worship/Resources.aspx

What it means to be a Mom...

My entire life, all I really wanted to be was a Mom. When  I was small, I would carry around my babies and talk to them all day long. I would set up my barbies and play house, and would always make sure all of the Skippers and Courtney's and Scotts (skipper's friends) were happy with their Mom. I would be devastated when my Dad would come in and tell me it was time for bed! WHAT! that meant my "make believe I was a Mommy" was over for the night... It was ok though because I would always tuck the dolls in before I actually went to bed......

I can remember like it was yesterday, pretending to be my Mom.  I would baby my brother, Charles, until he was babied out. I would feed him, change his diaper, change his clothes and even dress him like a girl when I wanted to have a daughter during my play time! :) (sorry Charles.) Being a Mom is pretty much all I ever wanted. I have found list and list of names I had written down which were the names I would be naming my children... If I had a girl, he middle name was ALWAYS Nicole. Sometimes her first name was Kirsten, sometimes it was Kelcey, and even sometimes it was Chelsey. ( but I ended up with a Sydney Ruth) I guess back then I didn't think I would have a boy because those names were rare to write down, but either way I had it all planed out.

So, what about being a Mom is so attractive to little girls??? Let me tell you. This little dream becomes a reality and everything your ever dreamed of becomes so much better in real life.... For me, What does it mean to be a mom? I will tell you as I type with one arm propped up on my oldest child as he lays beside me in my bed sound asleep. It is what a Mom does when her child has been sick and all he wants is to be comforted by his Mom....

It means, having the most precious souls in this entire world need you and want you. It means to have them call your name over a hundred times in a hour and each time you answer them as if it were the first time they called. It means sleeping through a Tornado, but bouncing up in the bed because you no longer hear their breath in the monitor. It means loving and caring and holding and giving and nurturing and pampering and spoiling and praising and disciplining these precious ones into responsible, loving and caring humans. It means being responsible for a life that only God could give you. It means waking up every morning and lifting my hands up high to say "Thank you Lord for trusting me with your children." It means laying my head down at night and looking up with a tear in my eye and saying "Thank you Lord for trusting me with your children."  It means waking up in the middle of the night and walking in their rooms just to touch them and feel their little hearts beat. It means cooking dinner and waiting for them to eat to make sure they didn't want yours, it means leaving for a trip alone and never really wanting to be alone, just wanting to know you still can be. It means dropping off your baby for his first day of kindergarten and crying all the way home. It means hearing your child is sick at school and your heart breaks for him before you even see him. It means taking your daughter to her dance class and catching yourself grinning from ear to ear even when her rhythm isn't exactly right. It means playing babies with your daughter just because you know she probably wants to be a mom as bad as you did. It means coloring with her even when you have a million other things you need to do. It mean pushing back bedtime so you can giggle over hearing your baby say his name for the first time over and over and over again. It means saying NO when you really want to pick them up and kiss their neck and say yes It means talking baby talk just like he does, just to get a response from him...... It means all of this and so much more.

Lord, I am humbled by your Grace. I am humbled knowing you gave me these three babies to raise and trust that I will raise them to love you and honor you and teach them to share your word. Lord, I get chills down my back when I think that you chose me.... YES ME to mother these perfect, beautiful, joyous children. What did I ever do to deserve it? That's right.... I don't deserve it..... I have been given Mercy and Grace and you love me so much more than I could ever love, that you trust me with them. Thank You. Thank You.

It is said that Gods Love is described as a Mother's Love for her child.
God said in Isaiah 66:13,"As a mother comforts her son, so will I comfort you.”
Thank You Lord... Thank You....

The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new. ~Rajneesh

A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. ~Tenneva Jordan

If you have a mom, there is nowhere you are likely to go where a prayer has not already been. ~Robert Brault,

Invisible

This Angela Thomas Study has really spoken to me.... It is as if she took a deep look in to my heart and started writing. Now, I will say that each week when I read the title, I think... maybe this one won't hit so close to home this time.... Not so much.

This weeks title was I am Invisible....CLEARLY not for me... I mean really... 3 kids, a husband, starting a new business, active in my Church, love my friends... ME? Invisible? Yep. Me! Invisible! This really goes to show that the outward appearance of someone is exactly that. An Appearance.

She touches on so many things, so I will name a few. Have you ever felt invisible in a new class at school? In your cubicle at your job? Do you lie in bed at night beside your husband to only feel invisible? Maybe you rock your baby to sleep at night while no one notices your hard work? Has there ever been a time when you were in a group of people where someone was talking to you while looking over your shoulder and you felt they were looking for someone more important than you? And when that other person showed up.... You felt invisible?

YES! YES I have. I think it is so hard for me when I feel invisible because I don't like to be invisible. Not because I enjoy for attention to be on me, but because growing up, my parents always made me feel VERY SEEN. :) I have always been the loud mouth of the group and invisible was not what I was. I am sure there were many times they wished I was!

As I look back (and even forward) on when I feel invisible, it stings.... For me, there have been sooo many times. Although my parents would always tell me I was pretty, I never felt it. I mean, I do have 2 eyes and a mirror. I think around 7th grade I started feeling like I wasn't very pretty, even when my mom would tell me how pretty my freckles were and how she loved my eyes. Even today she says she never told me that to make me feel good, she told me that because I was.... thanks mom.... everybody needs a mom like you.  Sooo, for me, feeling invisible in a crowd wasn't abnormal, but I guess I always thought that it was just normal.

I have always been very successful in any job I have had. I never really felt invisible because I was confident in what I did... Until my last job. In December when I received the call that we were going through lay offs... guess what.... I suddenly felt invisible. That was a feeling I will never forget. It was as if the past 4 years of hard work went un noticed. NOW, I will say that I know deep in my heart that God's hand was at work during that time. Being laid off was probably one of the biggest blessings I have received other than my children and my husband... But at the time, I was truly invisible.

I could go on and on and on about feeling invisible when I have my hair in a pony tail, my sweat pants on with baby throw up down my back..... And how there are nights I lay in the bed beside Chad and I am talking to him and I hear a snore..... Invisible? Pretty much....... But I think you get the picture here.

So, Angela Thomas puts it all into perspective..... Although we may feel invisible.... we are never invisible to God. Our Father, our protector, the one who loves us more than we could begin to love our own kids. I love this part of the study. She asked to insert your name and I have.

Kendall, he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. Kendall, the Lord watches over you- the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. Kendall, the Lord will keep you from all harm- he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore... Psalms 121: 3-8

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but he has given us a spirit of power and of love and of calm and well balanced mind and discipline and self-control. 2 Tim 1:7

I love to call you my friend....

Girls weekend!....
Friends... we have friends we grew up with, we have friends from high school, we have friends from college, we have friends from our neighborhood, from our children's school, from our Church, friends from work..... I love my friends. Most people who know me, they know I cherish my friendships and I put an extra effort into making sure I do all I can as a friend.

This weekend, me and 3 girl friends from college had our 1st annual Girls Beach Weekend! :) We have already planned out our next 5 years. I enjoyed every minute of it. In the past 5 years (since Cole was born) I haven't ever had a weekend just for myself. I thought I was dreaming for a split second. Me and these girls have so many many memories from college and BOY did we ever recount everyone of them this weekend. It was wonderful!

I met Brooke my freshman year of college. We instantly bonded and have had a close relationship ever since that first day. With her came her 2 best friends from high school Ragan and Catherine. Not always do these type of situations work out where everybody likes each other, but we did. I loved hanging out with them. We always made the most of our nights in college. We experienced ALOT together and in the dorms we were each others home away from home. We stayed friends all through college, and no matter what other separate friends we had or groups we became a part of, we still shared a special bond.

Our time together this weekend is forever cherished. We had such a good time staying up all night just talking. Talking about our faith, our families, our lives, the good the bad the ugly and the wonderful! We relaxed, went out for dinner and just really enjoyed our time together. It is funny how as you grow older and more mature, the things you appreciate change. 10 years ago, we would have planned a weekend of going out and partying and packed with too many things to do. Here we are 10 years later and for us fun was not having anyone ask us to do anything for them and just hanging out.

Brooke, Ragan and Catherine... Thank you for sharing your weekend with me. Thank you for being my friends.....

How to be the Perfect Parent

You probably thought I was going to have some fancy link on here to someone with a PhD on how to raise your children.... My exact reason for writing this.

I have read numerous self help blogs, interenet articles, Parent Magazine articles etc.... on HOW TO's. I have decided that I know the real How To...

Here is the answer-
As Parent's, let's quit being hard on ourselves. Who says one way is better than another? Who says my zoo of a house is any less perfect for my child than your spotless one? Who is to say my unorganzied mess of a drawer is any worse than your organized one (espeically when my kids can find anything they need in there)? Who says my singing and dancing in the car isn't as good as your organized play and dance time?

I think if we ask our kids, "Do you think Mommy is a good Mommy?" I am willing to bet they think you are the best. I know when I look back on my parents, I see nothing wrong with the way we played, our house or anything else. They were perfect to me....

So my question and answer is, Why Stress Ourselves out over it? And the answer is- Just ask your kid... they will probably say you are the Perfect Parent!